Im having such a major struggle right now internally. It hurts more so much but at the same time I feel numb to it. I try not to be a negative person because ive been to the darkside and survived such crazy things in life but I have such a negative outlook at this point. Ive spent a majority of my life taking a said 'family members' negativity towards me. The kind of negativity where digs are thrown constantly and its assumed I do nothing. I finally after years defended myself the other day and then was attacked by not just one but two 'family members' where it was again said I do nothing. My birthday is coming up and it was asked if I wanted to invite them or not and I sit here struggling for the words somewhat and struggling to have a positive mind. Do I invite the person or persons who bring negativity into my life every single time they are around to dinner to celebrate or do I do what is best for me and not. Im struggling with whats right and what is best for me personally. :/